Luau etiquette, made simple

A luau is a warm, relaxed evening, and nobody expects visitors to know every custom. A few simple habits, from how you receive your lei to how you tip, go a long way. This is the short version.

The lei greeting

Most Kauai luaus begin with a fresh flower or kukui nut lei. Accept it with a smile and a “mahalo”, and wear it through the evening, draped over the shoulders so it hangs down front and back. It is considered impolite to take a lei off in front of the person who gave it. At the end of the trip, many people return flower lei to nature, for example hung on a tree, rather than throwing them in the trash.

Aloha, mahalo and a few more words

Aloha means hello and goodbye, and more broadly love and warmth. Mahalo means thank you: use it freely with servers and performers. ʻOno means delicious, keiki are children, kamaʻaina are local residents, and a kumu hula is a master hula teacher. The emcee may ask the crowd for a loud “aloha”; join in.

Tipping

Check your confirmation first, because several luaus include gratuity in the price (the Grand Hyatt Kauai luau, for example, quotes rates including gratuity, taxes and fees). If it is not included, 15 to 20 percent for the service staff is standard. At an open bar, a dollar or two per drink is customary, and a pickup driver usually gets a few dollars per person. Many shows also collect donations for local hula schools; it is a direct way to support the performers’ halau.

During the show

Hula is storytelling, and some dances and chants are sacred to the performers, so keep talking low and phones on silent. Photos and video are usually welcome without flash. If a dancer invites you on stage, say yes and laugh at yourself; that is the point. Are commercial luaus culturally insensitive? They are shows rather than family celebrations, but the best are created and performed by Hawaiian and Polynesian practitioners who share their culture on their terms. Choosing a show with a kumu hula, like Luau Ka Hikina, and buying from local artisans is the respectful way to enjoy them. See our best luau comparison to pick one.